There should come a time in one's life when you are too old for drama. Apparently, my time has not come yet. An innocent trip to McDonald's with Hubby and the Ankle Biters ended up being an hour-long ordeal. The cops even got involved. Now, I'm not a person that will just call the cops randomly. Someone has to be in danger before I'll do that. I live in a small town and I know just about every cop, firefighter and paramedic thanks to my job at the Emergency Room. At work I don't hesitate to call the cops to help keep the peace just because I can, but in my personal life I could count on one hand the number of times I have had to call the cops on someone. That doesn't include the time I called the local PD about a car swerving all over the road or a light being out at an intersection...or the time they were chasing some kids through my yard and I called the dispatcher to tell them which direction the kids ran. Like I said, it's a small town, we all know each other and we look out for each other. So Saturday evening, during half-time of the Alabama/Tennessee game I might add, we decided to get some Mickey D's. The kids have this thing about going inside...probably because our McD's has video games they can play while we wait on our food...so we park and head across the parking lot. This guy literally runs out of the side door and jumps into his truck, which happens to be the truck that my oldest two boys are walking beside. This guy doesn't even have his door shut good and he's got is truck in reverse and starts peeling out...towards me and my 8 yr. old son. Hubby started banging on his truck to get his attention while I am screaming and shoving my child from my right side (where a truck tire is now) to safety on my other side. Hubby dented ol' boy's truck by banging on it. So, he finally stops in the middle of the parking lot, sticks his head out of his window and says, "What the [bleep] is going on?". I informed him in a slightly elevated voice that he almost ran over my child...to which he says. "Keep your [bleep bleep] kids out of the street, [bleep that rhymes with ditch]!" Well I can't recount the rest of the conversation because it would be mostly bleeps. I wish I could say that all the bleeps were his, but no. My children got to hear Mama say some words that I don't ever think they've heard before. I could smell the beer on this dude from eight feet away. He was drunk, disorderly, belligerent and driving around my town!! So, Mama did what Mama's do when drunk people try to run their babies over in parking lots...I called the Po-Po. Luckily, they pulled him over. Unfortunately, this guy has obviously been through this before because he pulls into his own driveway and runs inside. According to my friend, the police woman, this means that she lost line of sight on him and even if he was over the limit with alcohol it would be thrown out of court. I asked a few other of our town's finest about it and they all said the same thing. So, this guy knows how to get around the system. That tells me that he's done this before. She took my report and this morning I am going down to City Hall to talk to the Magistrate about pressing charges for Reckless Endangerment. I'm pretty frustrated at this point. How is it that a guy can drink and drive and almost kill people and they can't arrest him because he runs into his house?? Even though she saw him driving the vehicle?? I have no tolerance for a drunk. Give me a junkie any day of the week. Junkies have a goal, they have a plan most of the time and they are usually actually pretty polite because when they do come to the ER they know that an outburst will get them put out and then they won't get what they came for...but a drunk has none of that. A drunk has no goal, no plan, no control over their actions or mouth and they are dangerous. Now, that's not to say that someone who is already high isn't the same way, but I have a particular disdain for alcoholics. My daddy was an alcoholic. So, I go to press charges this morning which means that eventually it will go to court and I will have to testify about what happened. Hubby is pretty pessimistic that anything will come of it. I'm going through with it because at the very least it will create a paper trail against this guy. If he doesn't have a problem jumping behind the wheel while he's drunk then it's just a matter of time before he does kill someone. If pressing charges now means that next time he gets caught he already has something on his record I'm all for it. My poor son was so upset by the whole thing. By the time this guy peeled out of the parking lot (after cussing me like a dog in front of my children) my little one was so shook up he was crying and said "Mama, that guy tried to kill me!". It broke my heart and it still makes me want to find this guy and break important appendages. I can tell you one thing, if this guy had ever seen what I've seen he would never think about driving recklessly and he would always look for little ones when backing up. If he had ever had to hold a little one's skull together during CPR like I have because some careless person can't be bothered with looking before backing up I bet he would NEVER EVER drive recklessly again or drink and drive. I can hope for the best at least. Like I said, it's a small town and we look out for each other.
Seems like the only reason I blog anymore is to bitch. I'm sorry about that friends. I am consciously trying to avoid blogging now days specifically because I don't want to spend my time sitting around complaining. That being said, I have had some news this week that I cannot wrap my brain around. I have written before about my sisters E and T, who went on the cruise with me. These are sisters from my biological father. I also have a brother from their family. From my mother I only have one sister whose name also starts with an M. I will call her Em here..like Emily or Emma, just to keep things straight.
Em is my baby sister, five years younger than me, which makes her 26. The news I got this week that I cannot wrap my brain around is that Em is pregnant....with her 5th child. Yes, you heard me correctly...her FIFTH child. She is also on her second husband. She has 2 boys with the first man (one of whom is disabled) and a boy and a girl with the current man. Em also has major health issues that made it necessary for her first two children to have to be delivered early enough for the both of them to be medical miracles (we're talking second trimester births here!) and has needed a hysterectomy for the last 6 or 7 years because of these health problems. Its a miracle any of these babies have survived, they were all premature, she has almost died with every single one of them and now she is pregnant for the 5th time. Someone, please, please, please, explain to me: Why would a woman want to go through this??? I might need to add, although doing so clearly counts as gossip, that they are so financially strapped that they are frequently on government assistance, never have enough of anything that the kids need, her husband has only recently gotten a stable job and it might turn out to be seasonal during the farm season and end when the winter comes! Add to the fact that the house is so filthy that Em and I have come to blows over the condition those kids live in and that myself and my kids would never set foot into the house and I am doubly confused as to why...why...why on God's green earth would she have another baby??? She swears to me that protection was used and that she didn't want to have another baby and that she has no clue what they are going to but to that I say: Why didn't you fix the problem with either of the last two pregnancies? For the love of God, what would possess someone to be so irresponsible? I love my children but when I knew we couldn't support anymore mouths or that I couldn't possibly handle anymore stress we took care of it with a little snippity-snip-snip! I really have tried to let go of things like this in her life since we lost Mom. Since losing Mom I have tried to focus my sole attention on my own family. Life is short. I learned that from losing both my parents before I was 28 years old. Losing Mom in particular has forced me to start seeing what motherhood really is and the effects you have on your children for years to come. I have memories that are important to me that I am sure my Mother would never remember because to her it was just another passing moment in the day. It shows me that every moment is the chance to make a memory. It probably contributes to me feeling like a failure a lot because it adds more pressure than I need right now, but it also helps me remember what the big picture is here. Because of all of this, I worry about what kind of things Em's kids will remember growing up. Will they only have memories of filth and want? Will they have memories of Mom being so stressed and tired that she was never happy? (I'm assuming the stress because why wouldn't a 26 yr old with five kids be stressed?) I know she loves them, but what is the quality of the life she is giving them? What is the point in having more children than you can logically handle or support?? I have been praying so hard about this situation. I haven't said anything ugly to her about it, because really, what's the point? The fact is that there is going to be a new baby whether she needs another one or not. The baby is going to need love either way. I do love those kids. I love them enough that I've already told my husband that if the state ever stepped in because of the circumstances I would take all of them into our home rather than see them go to the state. At this point I just keep thinking, how can I possibly do that if she just keeps popping them out like Pez candy?? I feel bad for most of the feelings I have and I'm working on that. I love my sister, we're just nothing alike and have never seen eye to eye on anything. I pray that she finds a way to cope with all that she has been dealt. And, if the state ever comes knocking on my door, I'm going to need very large Valium and mainline of Capt. Morgan to stay sane.
There were pirate flags everywhere in Savannah. Apparently there is an extensive pirate history in Savannah. I had no idea. We passed by a restaurant called the Pirate House that boasts that Robert Louis Stevenson wrote the first two chapters of "Treasure Island" inside while sitting and listening to the old pirates' stories.
This is Mecca for Paula Deen lovers. The Lady and Sons Restaurant. It was good, fattening food and we didn't have to wait forever. We just asked for a seating, they told us to come back at a certain time and we waited about 10 minutes. Very crowded, but very good service...and yummy "home" food. If I weren't from the south I would have been blown away, but since I am I can say it was just good Soul Food!
There were tons of these bronze statues around downtown. This is the one I liked the best.
These rubber boots were hilarious. Very chic. I wanted to go inside and try some on but the store was closed :(
This sign cracked me up for various reasons. I think it was a Candy Kitchen or a Bakery, but fortunately the smells were good! If this sign hung at my house I couldn't make the same guarantee.
This sign hung at a restaurant called Five Guys. Some of you may have heard of it, but it is a burger joint. They have, I swear, the best hamburgers I have ever tasted.
It sort of had a "Happy Days" diner vibe going on.
You only order ONE order of fries at this place. The picture above is only one order, they were so freakin' awesome and yes that is Hubby's arm next to the giant paper bag of fries!
So these are just some random pics of Savannah I had lying around. Hope you enjoyed them!
Another church member that I don't know well lost her baby a few weeks before Ruthie passed away. Although this baby had been an expected loss I know the pain was the same for that family. As for my friend, I don't know what to say to her. I haven't seen her yet but I know when I do that I won't have the slightest clue what to say. There were already so many people crowded around the family immediately afterwards that I knew to give her space. They need life to calm down. They need quiet time after all the well-meaning people drift away (the way they always eventually do) to process what has happened to them and what this means for their family. I know this because that's how it was when I lost my mom. If losing my mom could do to me what it has and leave this much confusion and pain, I don't EVER want to know what my friend is going through. It has been a few weeks now, but this is the only time I have had to blog about it. I know from experience that people always say the same thing, they always bring food, they always send cards, they alway smile at you with the corners of their eyes crinkled up because they are trying not to make you sad, they always, ALWAYS want to hug you -even if you are not a hugging person. I remember those people and I don't want to be one of them. Not that there is anything at all wrong with, but it's just not me. I haven't decided what kind of person I am though. Am I the sort of person who sends a card randomly, weeks later to say I care? Am I the sort of person who makes a treat or meal and drops it by after everyone else is gone? Am I the sort of person who just chats with her without bringing it up? (By the way, my bible study group had a BBQ planned the afternoon of my mom's death and I asked them not to cancel and we went anyway. I have to say it was so great to be able to just pretend for a couple hours like everything was ok, and joke and eat like we did before.) I am not a hugger, so I know I won't be do any of that although I wouldn't shy away from an offered one.
So, here's what I want to know followers...
How would you handle it?
Tell me how would you handle the situation? How would you approach the topic -or not?
I pray for her and her family everyday...for now that is all I know how to do.
I'm chronically late, I talk too loudly and too much, I don't exercise like I should, I complain a lot, I'm a terrible slob and a worse housekeeper (my house always looks like it was robbed), I make my kids wash their own laundry so I can have time to write, BUT I also love my family fiercely, I have a heart for women carrying emotional damage, have been a mother longer than I have been an adult, will do anything for a friend, am a beach bum, love God with all my heart, want the world to be a better place and want to write more than I want my next breath.